Literal joy folks, no figures.

What a beautiful day for Iraq. Here are some Iraqi voices... freedom... freedom... freedom... and more freedom...

A Doormat? Is That What She Made Me Lug Up From Memphis?

Drink up ladies & gentlemen; here's a topic that hopefully appeals to the inebriated and nihilstic. when i go to heaven.../st peter he will say.../how did you earn your living?.../how did you earn your pay?... my reply was with a little bit of thunder.../earned my livin killin down under... when i go to bars.../the girls they will say.../how did you earn your living?.../how did you earn your pay?... my reply was with a cool kinda nod.../earned my living killing commies for my god... when i go home.../the hippies they will say... i replied as a pulled my 9.../get out of my way before i take your life... Ignore the absurdity of d Nova working out to Marine cadence. Consider instead the notion of Purpose; how the work of the individual relates to society. The quoted words above belie a machismo of mission and an individual that grasps a simple understanding of his relationship to his culture. He can feel confident in his position; he can express his Purpose without uncertainty to God, lovers, and antagonists. He can not, however, place that purpose within a larger context. He has a purpose, but that purpose is only immediate. Determining purpose in the events of the world is the act of writing a universal history, defined alternately as an attempt to find a meaningful pattern in the overall development of human societies(Hegel). Two texts out of Jack's bookshelf that deal with the modern incarnation of this concern are Fukuyama's The End of History and the Last Man, and Levy's War, Evil, and the End of History. Why the emphasis on the end of History? For Hegel, the end of history has been reached when society is universally just. Fukuyama's work was published in 1992, while Levy's was published ten years later. Any brief here would fail to do the texts justice, so it should suffice to reach the point...now: Fukuyama viewed the world with optimism, attempting to prove that the end of history had indeed been reached as liberal democracy and consumer capitalism swept the globe. Levy's travels to the Third World revealed and end of history that was stark and despairing. It may be that the challenge of this time is choosing one End or the other, and frankly, they both seem desperately static. Thoughts? What purpose should an individual apply himself to? Is there a point in applying one's self to any of this?

Hamsters have enormous testicles in proportion to their minute body-size.

THIS GUY IS AMAZING. READ THIS STORY. IT IS HEROIC. I KNOW DN IS OPPOSED TO CAPS BUT THIS IS FRIGGIN AMAZING AND WARRANTS CAPS. that's right--60 bottles of beer. Get the body you want... ...in Lynn, Mass. Squats and thrusts and glory holes. This clears up a lot. But I had a suspicion. Clean up after the tsunami, kiddies! And when you're all done, you get to play with the dancing froggy! Tsunamis are fun!!

Quick thought on D-Lowe in Dodgertown

Obviously, we all know Lowe signed with LA (the Dodgers, not the Angels of Anaheim). In another lukewarm offseason for LA, this is an awesome signing. This is why: Lowe's ERA has been really high the last two years in Boston, but: a) the stadium will be a better park for him to pitch in than Fenway. b) more great defense in LA, as in Boston. c) he'll reap the benefits of not having to face a DH, as he's not a power-pitcher. Also, for money-motivated reasons, today's ballplayers often perform well after changing uniforms--even if it doesn't have pinstripes--at least for one season (see: R. Clemens). and Lowe proved in the postseason he's still "got it"--and now that we know he can perform under the most intense pressure (and the fact that he's changing coasts) the notion that he's a basket-case is long gone. If the Dodgers get to the playoffs, to quote D.C., he'll be HUGE! My predictions for Lowe, taking all those factors into consideration, as well as the fact that he'll obviously have less run support: 14-16 wins, 3.60-3.90 ERA. Other prediction: 4-6 wins and three months on the DL for fat-fuck Wells, but 15+ wins from Schilling and a Cy Young-caliber performance from Wade Miller...(har har)

I'm Exhausted After Twenty-Five

"Son of man, set your face toward Gog of the land of Magog, the prince of Rosh, Meshech, and Tubal, and prophecy against him, and say, 'Thus says the Lord God, "Behold, I am against you, O Gog, prince of Rosh, Meshech, and Tubal. And I will turn you about, and put hooks into your jaws, and I will bring you out, and all your army, horses and horsemen, all of them splendidly attired, a great company with buckler and shield, all of them wielding swords; Persia, Ethiopia, and Put with them, all of them with shield and helmet; Gomer with all its troops; Beth-togarmah from the remote parts of the north with all its troops, many peoples with you." Ezekiel 38:2-6 The Year Twenty-Aught-Five is filled with dread and trepidation. Some of us will have seen a quarter century of Life, and truly, is the world any better? Probably not, which is also probably our fault. Mo Wiser has seen the big 2-5 and wound up in the Special Olympics. The fact is that twenty years on this planet was more than I ever wanted, and twenty-five is cruel and unusual punishment. Here's to 365 more chances to get the hell out. A brief retrospective of 2004: death eats bugs worst neighbor ever and finally you jerks can shut up....